Miscellaneous Ramblings...

Is it Spring yet? Even though we have had a very mild winter so far, I can't shake the feeling that the other shoe is about to drop just any day. And you know me, I hate cold weather. My husband laughs because I have Raynaud's syndrome. (Not sure about the spelling, too lazy today to look it up.) Cold causes me pain. Raynaud's sign is cyanosis, or the turning blue of the lips or extremities. He thinks it's all in my head, but it's not. Right now my toes are purple just because I don't have socks on. And the thermostat reads 66 degrees. That's with nothing on, because the temperature outside is in the 50's. And I refuse to run the heat when it's that mild, no matter what my body says. I have a faulty internal thermostat, it seems.

While everyone else is burning up, I'm turning on the heater. It's quite comical actually. I turn on the heater in the truck. He rolls down a window. I tell him I'll turn the heat off if he will just roll up the window, for heaven's sake. He rolls it up. I get cold. I sneak over to the panel without looking and flip it back on. Loud wails erupt from the back seat. "But Mommmmm, I'm burning up. I'm sweating. Please turn it off." And I comply. And sit and shiver.

If it's a long road trip, I usually carry a comforter and pillow. Doesn't matter what season, because if it's summertime, the boys will have the air conditioner cranked up high as it will go. We ride down the road with people staring at me like I'm a freak for covering up in 100 degree weather. So I'm a freak. So what.

I would be perfectly happy to move to a tropical climate if I could just carry everyone I love with me. Now isn't that a fantasy?

Novel update: 2300 hundred words into Chapter Two. Not sure if I even like Chapter Two. Trying to hold off on the rewrite and just move forward. But something's bugging me about it, and I can't put my finger on it. My cold purple finger.

And for those of you who say it's bad circulation due to my obesity, that's rude of you to say it. And there might be a grain of truth in it, but Raynaud's does not discriminate. It is not just fat people. Skinny people suffer with it as well.

Which leads me to the question I have been asked of why there are no pictures of me here. The truth is, A) my computer crashed with all my jpeg files in it. (Remember I lost the first novel attempt?) B) All the decent pics I have of me are at least 10 years old, when I was still young, and C)I don't have a digital camera to make any new ones at the moment. Finally, D) Who wants to see a fat purple chick on the internet?

I'm laughing as I type this, for you must think me a bitter old fool. Not a fool, just an insanely self-conscious freak with Raynaud's. And if you think that's funny, I hear bikinis are flying off Target's shelves faster than they can stock them. Have you got yours yet?