WW A Memo From Above

To: Everyone on Earth

Please do not place orders for houses, cars, millions, vacations, and etc. without proper authorization. All unauthorized requests will be discarded. If your account with the Almighty is past due or you do not currently have an account with Him, you will need to make arrangements prior to placing your order. He still requires a genuine request to complete the contract with you. Make your request directly to Him in person, you will not be denied.

You will receive a prompt confirmation of His approval. A full disclosure of the binding agreement can be found in many locations; churches, hotel rooms, hospitals, homes, prisons, and stores throughout the world. All privileges, benefits, and liabilities will be expressed in written detail. He has representatives in your area should you need assistance. Translators and mediators will also be available. Additional services will be provided to assist the disabled and or children too young to read.

If you should violate the terms of the contract, all implied benefits will be suspended until such time as the matter is rectified. You will not need to open a new account. Simply make a personal apology to the Almighty requesting His forgiveness. Then refrain from any further breach of contract by immersing yourself in the written covenant and in fellowship with Him.

Please retain this memo for your reference. You may make additional copies as needed. Thank you for your attention to these matters.

Sincerely,
Holy Spirit
Chief Correspondent