Chewin' and Drinkin'

Needless to say, the last week has been unbelievably stressful. Sometimes your mind plays tricks on you. My sister and I drove to Sonic to get us a cherry limeade and pass a few short minutes before our appointment at the funeral home to make arrangements.

While waiting for our drinks to arrive, my thirst overtook me, and I picked up my cup that had the remains of the sweet tea I had finished off earlier. I was just going to chew on some ice until my limeade came, so I took the lid off. To my surprise, stuck to the inside of the cup was a piece of chewing gum that had been chewed and stuck inside.

"Oh nooo," I moaned.

"What is it?" my sister answered.

"Who would do that?"

"What is it?"

"It's chewing gum. In my cup. And I drank every bit of that tea earlier. Oh gross!"

"That's crazy," she replied.

"I'm going to go by Wendy's and give them a piece of my mind." (Not that I had any left by this time.) "Oh, I'm going to be sick." I had visions of some pimple-faced, greasy haired teenage boy who thought it a hilarious prank to put his chewed gum in my cup. I had visions of some chattering pony-tailed drive-through girl coughing and her gum falling in my cup. And she probaby was carrying that dreaded Rotovirus that makes you have projectile vomiting and spastic diarrhea for days on end.

And then it dawned on my sister. "Wait a minute. I had gum in my mouth when I got in the car. That has to be mine. I don't remember putting it in there, though. Let me smell it. If it's peppermint, it's mine."

We looked at each other in like we were in the twilight zone. She sniffed.

"It's peppermint. I must have put it in there thinking it was an old cup. Sorry. I still don't remember doing it."

"Neither do I. And I was sitting right here. Oh, thank God..." And then burts of hysterical laughter. Amidst the grief. Amidst the stress. Uncontrollable laughter. If people had seen us, they would have had us committed.

And the moral of this story is: Chewin' is better than drinkin', but both are risky to say the least.