More than Skin Deep

Okay, I tried camping out in the little cabin last night. I learned two things: One, I am too old for roughing it, and two, if you're going to camp out, don't do it when it is going to be 44 degrees during the night. Still, it was fun while it lasted, and I think that maybe I should have had at least two children, so that they could enjoy it together.

My son is an only child. He gets lonesome. Mama gets to play deer hunting, army games, and baseball. Sometimes she loves it, and sometimes she sacrificially endures. But one thing is for certain, I love that child with all I have and all I am. He is the miracle I prayed for. The joy of my life. And when he looks at me and tells me my new blonde tresses look weird and I cry--I can look back and laugh. And I love him all the more when he tells me, "Mama, you're still beautiful."

I love him because he makes me wonderful homemade cards on Mother's Day. I love him because he reminds me of what's important. The other day, he was browing myspace pictures with me, and I happened to comment on some of the more bizarre-looking people. And my son gently reminded me, "Yes, but that's how God made them, Mama." Granted, some of these have altered what God gave them with peircings, wild makeup, and tattoos. But yes, God made us all beautiful. It's when we try to be what we're not that we become, "weird." God loves us all, no matter what we do to ourselves. We do not need to change ourselves for his benefit, at least not on the outside. What we must focus on changing is on the inside. And more often than not, I am guilty of trying to change this on my own. I forget that He is the one that does the changing--that with His help I become who I am meant to be.

If I spent half the time I spend on my outward appearance in prayer and looking into that mirror of His word, a lot of things would change for the better on the inside. I need to stop trying to be what I am not, and be who He created me to be. Like my novel, I am a work in progress, and He is the Master craftsman who makes all things beautiful in His time. As time goes on, I will feel more aches and pains as I attempt to keep up with my little man. I will grow old with wrinkles and gray hair, and more rolls around the middle. But what I want him to remember about his mama is that she was beautiful inside and that she always took time to show him love, understanding, and the pathway to God. Pray that I can be a good mother to him all his days.