Fighting the Good Fight

The sun is sinking behind my shoulder. What an awesome day to be alive in God's world. Spring has sprung here in Tennessee, and soon we will have to do something about that grass growing. Last winter I was wondering if we would even be in this house for another spring. But we are here. For one more day we have survived. No one has foreclosed. No one has repossessed. I still feel the wolf howling at my door. I still wonder what each new day will bring. I still struggle to keep my faith alive. And yet, I'm still here--still wearing that sign that a fellow blogger, Mary, talks about, "Work In Progress" upon my back.

I know I'm not perfect. So many unbelievers expect us Christians to have it all together. They watch and wait for us to slip up, to fail, to sin. I know people are watching to see what my reaction to these trials are. And I know that they are going to see days when I sadly fail. There are days, yes, when I hang my head and cry. I am human. I have not arrived yet. I am just like you, unbeliever--except for the Hope I have within. If not for Christ, there would be no hope. If not for Christ, I might have overdosed by now--or killed myself driving drunk. No, I am not a drug user. But who knows where I might be today--if not for Christ.

I struggle with fear and anger. I struggle with envy and bitterness. These are the things that Christ is working to perfect in me daily. I struggle with feelings of worthlessness, yet I know that in Christ I am a new creation. I have to remind myself that I am the apple of His eye. I have all the same emotions as you. Christ was tempted in all points, as we. Yet he was sinless.
Today I stopped and asked him how he managed to overcome that carnal nature. His answer: Sacrifice. He sacrificed his entire being. He totally gave Himself up to the will of His father. It was not an easy life. He was betrayed by even His closest friends. And I think I have been wronged...No, my friend. We don't know what it means to be literally crucified.

I am struggling with many fears today as I write this. If you have read my blog very much, you know that it is, indeed, a rollercoaster for me. Up one day. Down the next. When you pray, remember me. If you have requests, leave them here. I will pray. Together we will win this battle for God's glory. Have a good night all.